~TIme out~

For the first weekend,I did no studying.I should be,seeing that I have a 15marks small test on Monday.What I actually did..

Woke up at 8.30am,went shopping for food at 10.30am.Cooked ABC soup for myself (SS and TY said it was good!!hurray!!!) and a super-cheap-in-Malaysia-but-freaking-expensive-in-Japan long beans for lunch.(The soup cost me 1freaking hour of patience)They came in for a chat for 3hours,chat on the phone for another hour.By then its 4pm...~_~"

Since didn't do any studying d,just go on lepak lu..Went shopping with them again for 2freaking hours (gals can really shop hor??),got 2 tops for 1000yen..haha..Makan kat Saizeriya at 6pm,came back at 8.30pm.Whole day gone..

Online til now..No one to chat with(YY,u fei me go your girl'd night out!!!=P),but I can't be bothered.No idea since when I have 121 tracks in my music playlist.I use to wonder how could one download so many songs,in fact listen to so many songs..Now,I finally feel the need to listen to all of them..Tired..Go to bed lu..Oyasumi..

~Words and liars~

The whole world lies,everyone is a liar.If it's not true,name me a person who doesn't lie.People lie,to get what they want,to hear what the want,to get away with what they have done.The whole world is a fake,heck,life is all but a play.Everyone has a role to play,but when someone plays a role which is not their own,the rest gets confused,for it was against what they have believed all this while.

Words,can be beautiful,can be hurtful and it is also a handy tool for a liar..People believe what was written,what was being expressed by 'words',because it is after all a tool of comunication.Ironically though,some people use words to create lies and with it comes drama,or if it is a white lie,people around them gets what they wanted to hear and live happily ever after.But since when does everything has a beautiful ending?

I learnt that sometimes,honesty is not always the best policy.And that people can't be bothered to listen...Reminds me of Beyonce's song Listen..

~Thank you~

Thank you for being so patient with me this 3months..
Thank you for letting me sharing my problems with you.
Thank you for all the memories within this 3months,
And lastly thank you for lettting me go...

~The Cruel Truth~

It is a sad thought reading this article..Link I couldn't imagine the horror of one had to face in their lives so many years ago and yet lived on for so long,scarred.I really respect her for being able to live on this long to share her story.I would have chosen to commit suicide than face the horror of being raped over and over again,or live on so long everyday with fear in me haunting me each and everyday.

My point of view however,is that,these things happened in the past, what has been done has been done.The Japanese will not admit their sin,the Chinese can live on hating them forever.But the sad thing is,things couldn't change anymore for the better.If the Japanese pay compensations to the Chinese,would it changed history?Could the Chinese women live on unscarred then?The sad truth is no,things won't change.And I believe the granny knows...

But the world needs to know the truth,and that is a right the world is entitled to know..

In a way,I'm glad she lived on to tell.In another,I sympathise with her living in dark shadows all this while.Comes our century,we lived in harmony (almost) with the Japanese,in fact,ironically,Japanese are much respect in a lot of aspects.It shows that either the world is living in ignorance,or we could say that its better to forgive and forget.Maybe,I don't have the right to say anything for I'm not one of those victims of the cruel WW2.But I do believe that if its for the good of all,what has happened has happened,there's no need to create trouble by bring up what has happened in the past over and over again..History taught us enough what we need to know,what's the point of passing down hatred to the next generation I wonder..

Maybe a lot of you don't agree with me,but I'm open to opinions..Do share..

~Friday,22nd of June~

Friday,22nd of June..sometimes don't you think writing a title is a hassle?Especially when writing a blog,because it up to you what you want to write,and it depends on your train of thought of that particular moment and mood..So..titles aside,let's go random again..

Just one hour ago I came back from the only eatery I found which doesn't closes at 9pm.It actually closes at 2am!!The place is called Denny's which,like Saizeriya is a place where they serve a variety of pastas,steaks,desserts and limited Japanese cuisine.But unlike Saizeriya which serves a resonable amount at a reasonable,affordable price,Denny's price is affordable too..But you have to wonder why everything is in small size..As if the Japanese have such small stomach.For one piece of grilled chicken(pathetically small),it cost me 550yen,and for half a french toast,it cost me 250yen.Seriously,the chicken tasted nice,but even for gals,the portion is way too small..One pathethic piece?no,I should say,slice,550yen*shakes head..9of us went,we all had second rounds.All were not full yet,but the price was too killing so...Drink more water lor..

It was fun going out today.My first time hanging out with the other gals aside from my usual gang.Reminded me of my gang in KL ,reallly miss you guys a lot.Though we didn't go out for mamak as often or some cosy-but-cut-throat restaurants,we had our share of fun gals-talk,at the school ground near Block G,at YY'S house..Now,one is in Australia,one in Japan,the rest scattered around different Universities in Malaysia..Even when I went back to Malaysia,it's hard for all of us to meet up..*sigh..

Pushing sad thoughts aside,summer is coming.The weather getting warmer and sunnier by the day.Time to move out summer clothings,sun blocks and most importantly..The fan..haha..Can't wait for summer holidays!!I had enough of class for the time being...and my life here...Summer here I come!!

~Time Flies~

I never knew that little things in life could actually bring so much happiness to me.Guess it's because after exam,I managed to relax a little,to actually do things I don't usually do.

Since I've become a 4th year,I barely had the time to rest and relax.Besides the time when I rush for my exam,even my usual days,I'll be rushing to complete my report,study for the next day's small test etc..Even if I have the time to online,it'll be the same few links,blog hopping,reading The Star etc..

Recently,I managed to Skype a friend across the sea,within Japan whom I've long time never chatted to,chatted on MSN with my kaki mamak,read a few friends blog who seldom update,ate Mango parfait etc.Besides noticing that somethings are better left unspoken,I also noticed that even when we are growing up,maturing and facing different obstacles in our own different lives,we still have the same image of that certain person in our mind.Be it we are in Japan,India,Australia,America,UK,should we one day say,meet up back in our beloved Malaysia,our image of that person would still be the same.Our discussions will still revolves around the same topic we discussed before we went our own ways years ago...

That said,I suddenly feel very blessed knowing these people.....and......

My English sucks nowdays... damn,I even have problem expressing myself

~开心事~

感觉上好象好久没有遇到什么开心的事了。。这个星期遇到两件开心事哦，还觉得蛮爽的。。不知道什么时候开始，真正令我开心的事越变越少，烦恼的事反而越变越多。。

星期四那一天，我学会打乒乓。班上的女生都去练高专祭要表演的舞蹈，只剩下我还有两位女生不想练(搞错！高专祭在10月叻，这么早练干嘛??)所以老师为了凑人数，也参我们打。。4人打还蛮难的所以。。。我和老师练咯。。(你们两个给我记住!!)不过也好啦，从来没有打过乒乓的我，在老师的严格要求之下，我会打了哦!!还蛮开心的。。哈哈

星期五那一天，我们有“创造工业”的发表会，就是把自己研究成果，创造的东西用Power Point给presentation。开心的是，我们的组得了奖哦!!那奖是颁发给整体上发表的最好的研究室，分数包括发表，回答问题，Power Point的魅力等等。。我超开心的是因为，身为留学生的我，没有连累到我的同伴，也能一起得奖。。爽！明天还要和她们出去庆祝一番!!

今天是星期六，遇到不开心的事。。连做KAYA两次都失败。。算了。。明天，去庆祝庆祝!!yay!!!

~Rainy season~

Ever notice that as it gets warmer,when Spring slowlys walks away and Summer stepping in,there's always some pitter-patter that goes along with it?Ever notice that during this time of the year,the weather seems very similar to Malaysia?The rainy season in Japan,is known as 梅雨 and it falls between the exchange from Spring to Summer,where it gets from warm to hot..

Why suddenly talk about rain huh?You might wonder..It might be because of the similarity of this rainy season with Malaysia's weather,the warmth and temprature,just the right 'feel'..It might be because of the similarity,so much so that it made me think of going home..Why do people say when it rains,one would get emotionally sad,I used to wonder,for I loved the rain in Malaysia..But know,I seemed to more or less understand...

Because of this weather(and maybe part of the reason that I've just finished exam and feel mentally tired),I suddenly have the thought of 'what if' again.. What if I'm not in Japan,and I could be for my friend when he needed me most?What if it is not Japan that I've reached,that I should further my studies in UM?What if.....I'm not going back to Malaysia til July 2009...

Being here in Japan,you could predict almost everything.You could plan your hols 2years ahead,1year ahead etc.Because the Japanese like to 'Plan well',to make sure that everything goes well,to ensure that accidents are decreased to the lowest percentage.So much so that when accidents do happen,they got their shocked of their life..

And thus,because I am in Japan,I have to learn to plan as well..I have to plan to take responsibility for my actions.My main dilemma of planning is the choice I have to make.Should I get into a averagely good University with a sensei' s recommendation letter and save the time and pressure studying so hard for the next 1 year plus get to go back by July 2008,or I should study hard and get into the top Engineering/Technology University in Japan, but in exchange,not go back to Malaysia til 2009 July?

The only difference is once I passed the recommendation interview,I couldn't accept nor chose other Universities..But should I forego recommendation, and take entrance tests for the University of my choice (and other Univerities as well),it means I have to study for the rest of my time here until I pass next year..Tell me,how long could you stand studying non stop???
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Guess,it's up to how badly to I want to go to that 'TOP' U huh??
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How I wish I'm back at my window sill,sitting and staring at the rain in my room at the age of 14,just listening to the patter of the rain and sucking in the fresh cold air along with it...

~I'm back~

It's 9.20pm.Just had dinner with Mr. Lawson,Hirai Sensei,Soo,Shiori,Wakebe at Akindo Sushi..After dinner,I've been in a daze til now..I'm so dead tired after studying til midnight and waking up at 5am..(my neighbour woke me up with her door banging..shit)..Blur..

Exam finally finished today.Sorry for the lack of updates,I've been studying for the exam 3weeks ago,either that or my small tests..This is my 4th year life..BUSY..Numerous times I've thought of updating but I just couldn't find the mood or time to do so..

Of course,loads of things have happened.The most recent one(excluding my exam)is my dearest friend's sister sudden death.I was really depressed after hearing the news..I..I..was for the first time,lost at words of what to say to my friend..It hurt me so much to see what he have to go through..

I've met her once,and instantly I felt she's someone sweet and nice.That was in April 1st 2004,my one and only image of her.Although I don't know her that well,but I was really sad to hear the news,especially since she's my friend's sister..Be strong man..be strong..(if you're reading this)

Life....a never ending circle..along the way,we meet a lot of people,get and lose a lot of things,experience a lot of sweet and sour..So far human beings have faced and overcome lots of hurdles and obstacles,but sad to say some prevail,some don't.

Often I've thought,why do I complain anyway?Have I not gotten what I want and blessed with a lot of things in life that others couldn't get?Have I not met a lot of happiness and chances and interesting people,who cherish me as much as I do with them?So why,I ask myself at times,do I complain anyway?I have the right not to be satisfied,if it is to push myself to strive for the better.But nowadays,more often than not,I found myself to say 'muri muri'(impossible!impossible!),the way the Japanese do..I should not say impossible knowing the fact that no matter how difficult things in life seems to be,"When there's a will,there's a way"..

It's just one of those days,with fatigue and melanchonic music surrounding me right now..I feel really ...not myself..Don't worry,I'll be up and about by tomorrow..RIP gal,rest in peace...