Its always hard to write a blog because in the end..I usually write something which is far from what I intended to write.I'm no perfectionist in blog writing therefore I don't edit,delete and rewrite.I just go with the flow..
And as of always,this blog is just some jumbled up thoughts of mine which I delibrately wanna voice out somewhere.During exam week,that's when my crazy thoughts/questions reaches its peak..
1.I wonder why you guys read my blog.I'm no Kennysia,I don't write things that amazes people.I don't write about the Japanese community here.I seldom write about my life here.I seldom write about the news(though more often than not I feel like it when I come upon some interesting article)I just write what I feel like writing,my feelings,my thoughts and my travels.So what,exactly is the attraction of my blog that draws you back to read?My well being in Japan?Your concern as a friend?I wonder..
2.What am I going to do with my life?Of course I'm thinking of furthering my studies til University in Japan.But nowadays,I wonder if I should go for Tokodai.(Tokyo Institute of Technology)Basically,I don't have a strong passion for Chemistry or anythings else that matters,I just do what I deem is best or being told,what is best.I felt like I'm a puppet of myself.Of the virtues and discipline I was taught.But my parents never taught me to go overboard.Some 'workaholic-poison' is in our blood I guess,my sis was at home studying for her STPM til 11.50pm when the exam starts at 12noon.Reason?She felt like she haven't studied enough..*sweat
3.I wonder how people can just stay upbeat all the time..
How could anyone be so sure of their lives,when all I did is ponder?
How could anyone be happy all the time,when all I have is somber?
4.Why do I always 'draw-a-line'?Seriously,I could never get too intimate with anyone..My so-called best friends since secondary school never actually seen me cry,no one actually know exactly how I feel about things or my purposes of doing things.Because I always have a tendency to detached myself from someone before I'm being 'exposed'..I might say,I just lack confidence when I know that a certain someone can see through me,or my weakness.Its like a wall I built around me being broken..and I don't really fancy that.Even if I have a lot of close male friends,I usually try to stay wary that we wouldn't get too intimate,I'm afraid of crossing over that comfort zone,that the friend might wanna be more than friends.This tendency happened a couple of times,and I usually back away when I notice their intentions.I just wanna be friends..nothing more..
5.I feel like I'm such a drama queen.Reading other people's post,Mayc's especially,they don't complain about how tiring their life is,they don't brag about their achievements.All I can see is them having fun with their lives,working hard and living on.They don't burden people with their complaints in life in their blog,even though I'm sure they do have their suffers as well.I seriously respect these people.I have a weird thought that what I write or do,seems to want to attract attention to myself unintentionally.Weird..
That's all..Sorry for the long post.Just some thoughts.
哇!!梁文音被PK掉，好可惜!!可是我也真的真的好喜欢Alisa。
她唱歌真的好好听喔，林健辉也好棒。。沉迷与超级星光大道了。。
每看一次就被感动几次。。
歌,果然能牵动人心。
进入5强了，每次看到一个又一个被淘汰掉。。
会伤心，会失落，会觉得很遗憾。。
可是，会继续看下去，从他们身上学到的东西，真不少。。
真的是“人生如戏，戏如人生”。。
歌如人生
5 years ago
14 comments:
Oh you just had the "staying-in-suzuka-too-long-and-everything-went-boom" disease. lol and it's a normal thing to write and delete and rewrite. I end up not posting up anything most of the time :p
1. Ppl read others' blogs to get more ideas and to know happenings in other places. Just be youself.No need to be kennysia. he's just an ass. a smart ass with good ideas.:p i read yours cuz i want to see more cute girls. but u never put up cute girls pic:p
2.what to do with your life? hhhmm same question i asked myself everyday lol. but i guess there are always choices. one, you can be like me go with the flow type, which is very dangerous cuz you might be flown away from what you really want to do. lol OR, you can be strong, holding your own dreams and no matter what it takes, you'll work something out to achieve them. Yet in the end, there is a need to have an ending point, the main thing, what you really want to do :) think slowly you still have time. and it's also about QUALITY not QUANTITY.:) eg. study the whole year but fell sick the day before exam. and sad to say, welcome to the world which only give credits on the result, not in between.
3.everybody has their ups and downs. Maybe the ones who are always positive, or have something/somebody positive around them, will stay positive. OPEN UP!!!
4.hhmmm. draw a line??? i do that most of the time, on purpose. lol but again..OPEN UP. no need to be so rigid. relax. sometimes even you are into the "zone", just let yourself fall into the "zone" lol isnt it life is all about? even it's the wrong person, life is too short for you to worry about it.:)
NOTE : "a fall is when you dont pick yourself up"
5.blogs reflect the writer's thoughts and feelings.kennysia has lots of opinions about other things beside himself.though sometimes he wrte about himself as well. write more about your achievements if you feel that you are satisfied with them. positive thining people will say "shit she's achiving a lot. i need to brush up my ass and be a better man". negatives will say "`#$%&#$%. wtf is she writing. like i dont have those"
not a good role model myself. but lately i think life is too short for us to worry. worry of whoever is better than us. worry about what other ppl think about us. bla bla bla. YES, we live in a planet with other living things and YES we HAVE to respect their way of life/thinking BUT NO, we should have our own thoughts, good thoughts with the GOOD BRAIN GOD gave us.:)
a friend of mine introduced me this. check it out http://hobbes.ncsa.uiuc.edu/desiderata.html
Thanks Ben for the advises..I like the passage you showed me.Very meaningful.Thanks again
Long comment b4 me!!!
I dont read kennysia.
Ppl just attracted to different things.
Just have to say,Mayc blog really nice..
I always feel 'peaceful' after reading her entry.
Sometimes ppl just cant say their words out,thats why we blog.
No matter its complaint or etc.
为什么星光大道会出现声乐!
Why i read your blog?cos u're a fren,and i care about wat's happening lo,dat's y~
not everyone planned their wholelife ahead 1 la...try finish ur task at hand first and only think abt those big decisions when its times?maybe its easier gua...
Stay positive,den u'll be a happier person!~~tommorow is another day~~
haha u DO think too much ;p
i think i know how u feel.
strong on the outside for ppl to see, but sensitive and delicate on the inside.
it's ok to expose ourselves in that way, i guess.
to cry.
to show our emotions.
that's what being human is all about.
and hey, i never touched kenny sia's or xia xue's blogs.
i read urs and our friends' blogs (except shengcui's because after many months, still same post wan "-.-) because that's one of the ways we can keep in touch and know how and where life carries each one of us.
^_^
it is never a hard thing to write a blog because at the end of the day, IT IS YOUR BLOG AND YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHTS TO WRITE WHATEVER YOU WHAT TO (sorry for the caps)
although i do not leave comments here often, but it doesn't mean i do not read your blog. but there will surely a reason why people return to your blog again each time.
whether what you will do in the future, what i can say is "you can only plan it, but not decide it". i always believe in fate and what lies in front of us is already decided, although it is not visible to us. however, we still can try to change it to make it a better outcome eventually.
good luck =)
i ain't perfect darling.. and now, u're gonna make me all emo edi reading ur post.. =(
n thankiu shuk yee.. i din know tht.
knowing someone out there has the same feeling,thoughts and problems that i'm going through now give me strengh to my stumbling feet as i battle the crowd on life's busy street. this is the reason why i read your blog. d^-^
There are already so many advises...i dont think u wanna hear anymore from me.
Anyway I do enjoy your "honest" blog.
erm......i read ur blog may be just want to get to what is happening with my friend...hahahaha
but most of my blog not my witting, i just quote some nice passage,seems i am not writing.
last just wanna ask you a question....
What would do if were not afraid??
Take care
Hmm....it's all dark and gloomy here as usual. Strange that I always see you smiling and laughi......oh right, the "draw the line thing"...
Anyway, the best of advices are already written by ben.....but I do have something that I like to say here....saw this somewhere.
"Remember, you are unique.....just like everybody else"
I read your blog off and on to know what's happening in your life. It helps when most of your good friends are studying abroad=)
About chem eng, I just finish my 1st sem of 2nd year and I can tell you that there is hardly any chemistry in the course. More of material and energy balances, physics stuff etc. People always get the misconception that chemical engineering is all about chemistry. It really isn't. It's more about manufacturing processes in plants and all. Hope that helps a little.
I have my emo moments and only really close people know about them. I choose not to blog about them because well, I'd appear weak and I don't fancy washing dirty linen in public anyway. That's why my blog has more of the superficial stuff coz private stuff is well, private=p
And don't apologise for what you write or how long you write it. It's your own blog for goodness sake!
I read your blog because i want to know more about you, things that u're doing, and maybe things that we don't talk out loud as a friend. It helps to strengten the friendship in a way. =)
U r the least drama quess i know. Hehe ^^ Blogging emo-ly is not bad because everyone has their emo period. So no worries. If you chose to tell us ur emo matters, we will listen then. =)
Go all up and hyper again with life ya. love ya!
my body is still aching...but that's not the point i'm here. i read your blog geh, though hardly dropping some comments here. i read because sometimes your words hit me and make me think about myself too. that's the magic of words, linking the writer and the readers, booming ideas and thoughts around. keep on the spirit then!
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